By Steve Wells

Recently this question was posed on the EFT Practitioners Linked In group about psychological
reversal:

Psychological reversal? Can anyone explain how we can best explain to students how tapping
the Karate chop point during set up ‘fixes’ this? I’m confused myself …

First some background for those new to tapping and EFT: Psychological reversal is the concept
that someone’s energy system can be reversed, as in flowing in the opposite direction, from
their intention. It was used in EFT and its predecessor TFT as an explanation for failure to
progress, and is  seen as the basis of self-sabotage. In EFT the “correction” for
psychological reversal was supposed to be the set-up statement, which includes a verbal
description of the problem, combined with a self-acceptance statement (such as I deeply and
completely love and accept myself), whilst tapping on the karate chop point or rubbing a sore
spot on the chest.

Here’s my response to the question which was posed:

There is no such thing as psychological reversal and there is no need to tap on any
particular points to “reverse” it. What many EFT’ers call psychological reversal is what
therapists have been calling resistance, secondary gain, self-sabotage, and so on for many
years, ALL of may simply be different aspects of the problem OR a failure on the
practitioner’s part to get rapport, understand the problem, engage meaningfully, provide
safety, or address treatment to the right area, among other things.

It seems EFT Creator Gary Craig has also come to this point of view, as he now states in his
online tutorial:

“The term Psychological Reversal (PR) has been eliminated because, after years of experience,
I think it was mis-named. In practice, PR is a form of secondary gain/loss or a new aspect of
the original problem. While the correction for PR remains in the Basic Recipe, I have found
that PR can be handled effectively with the proper treatment of Aspects, Specific Events, and
Detective Work.”

However, Gary does say “the correction for PR remains in the Basic Recipe”. Now why you still
need to include the “correction for PR” if you no longer believe in it, I don’t know! Still,
Gary has said that he likes using the set-up language to do reframes and it makes sense to be
tapping when you do.

By the way, the set-up statement can be a nice way of framing a problem but can also lead
many people into thinking it is really necessary to use it for results, that using words to
describe the problem is necessary to treat problems effectively, or that there is something
magical in a self-accepting statement, when anyone who tests this can find that you will get
results without any set-up statements, sometimes the words can get in the way of really
focusing mindfully on your issue, and using self-accepting statements actually tunes the
client into their lack of self-acceptance rather than helping them to accept themselves more.
The fruitless search for the perfect words to describe the core issue also prevents many
people from being meaningfully helped, holds them back from using the tapping, and frustrates
many practitioners who would do better to focus more attention onto their clients…

I should say that some years ago when we were developing our own Simple Energy Techniques
(SET) I discussed with Gary how we were getting results without any need to use the set-up
statement, just simply to go with whatever is present and tap, Gary was adamant that the
set-up would be necessary for more difficult issues. Looks like his view on this has changed…

By Steve Wells

“I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.”
- Mark Twain

You become what you think about – philosophers and thinkers have been telling us this
for centuries. But what if they are wrong? For when you look at it many of our thoughts
actually have very little – if any – impact at all.

Many people think the same thoughts for years without any discernible change in their
action or results. I have a friend who for all 33 years I’ve known him has been saying
that his time is about to end, he’s constantly thinking this and believes what he says.
Now approaching 80 I suppose the odds of his being correct are improving!

Imagine if all of your ongoing ridiculous disjointed and often contradictory thoughts
were each instantly turned into their physical counterpart! What a chaos your life would
be!

The reality is that some of your thoughts influence (but do not control) your actions,
and therefore your results, more than others – and these are the thoughts you have that
are emotionalized.

Without the energy of emotion, thoughts have no power.

You have much more chance of “becoming”, or at least being influenced by, what you think
about with feeling.  As it says in the Bible “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.”

However, even if you have a really intense thought laden with lots of emotion, it
doesn’t necessarily mean that thought will become real. Look at my friend whose scary
thought which worried him incessantly has never yet come true. My Mum similarly worried
endlessly about becoming ill. Now with alzheimers and still physically robust, blessedly
those worries are gone.

And despite what “Law of Attraction” cultists will have you believe, even if you think
and feel really intensely about something you want, without action you still won’t
necessarily manifest much in terms of results in the material world. If you look at real
results, those who are thinking it and even those who are feeling it without action are
being overtaken by those who are doing it (even those without the “right” thinking and
vibration!).

And just because a thought has lots of emotion doesn’t mean we have to act on it, it
just increases the likelihood we will. But feeling definitely trumps mere thought alone
when it comes to influencing action.

It’s possible to think a thought and for it to have absolutely no discernible effect on
you at all. You are not hooked by it. It flows right through you. It doesn’t affect you
and it certainly doesn’t influence your actions.

Anyone who has experienced deep mediation or experienced the effects of effective Energy
Treatment using SET or EFT tapping knows this to be true. After an Energy Treatment via
SET you can often think the same “negative” thought – even one which previously really
affected you – and try really hard to conjure up some emotional intensity by thinking it
in its worst form and the effect just isn’t there.

If the thought can be there and yet have no effect on you then the thought itself must
not be the problem. This must cause some challenges to the cognitive therapists among
us, surely?

It is not the thought but the emotional attachment which is the real cause of our
suffering. Release the emotion which has become associated to the thought and the thought
loses all of its presumed power.

That idea is then released back into the world of ideas and is now easily seen as simply
an idea, a concept, or a story, which can be seen from many sides, examined and
entertained, but does not need to be saluted emotionally, or reacted to, or acted upon.

Ultimately then, it must be possible to think any thought at all, and for it to have no
significant effect on you emotionally or physically. Is this where real freedom lies, in
the freedom from emotional attachment to ideas? Freedom from thought, actually.

Many religious traditions have pointed to this:

Since everything is but an apparition, having nothing to do with good or bad, acceptance
or rejection, one may well burst out in laughter.
- Longchenpa (Tibetan Buddhist teacher)

To the pure, all things are pure… (Titus 1:15)

“Out beyond the rightness or wrongness of things there is a field, I’ll meet you there”
-  Rumi (Sufi poet)

Effective Energy Treatment releases the emotional attachment which  binds us so strongly
to the pain of one perspective, one idea, one thought, one choice for our actions, one
story for our life, one constricted view of our potential, one name for a person, one
limiting identity…

Ultimately, as we release these emotion-based attachments, we reach a place where we are
free of judgment. Then we can be where we are and see it for the first time.

Let’s end with one more from Rumi:

This being human is a guest house
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
- Rumi

by Steve Wells

“Eating ice cream is easy. Making something that matters is hard.” – Seth Godin

Over 70 years ago Albert E. N. Gray wrote an essay called The Common Denominator of Success. From his research on what led some people to become successful while others did not he concluded:

“The common denominator of success — the secret of success of every(one) who has ever been successful — lies in the fact that (they) formed the habit of doing things that failures don’t like to do.”

In analysing the biggest producers in his own field of life insurance, Gray asked:

“Perhaps you have wondered why it is that our biggest producers seem to like to do the things that you don’t like to do. They don’t!”

It is common in the tapping world to find people who encourage you to work on changing your “vibration” in order to be successful. We are all supposed to get ourselves to feel good then we can change. But as Gray discovered, many, in fact most, people who are successful don’t wait until they feel good before they take action, they manage to get themselves to take action despite their uncomfortable feelings. And that is why they succeed.

Gray found that successful people manage to get themselves to do the things that people who are not successful don’t do and won’t do, not because they like doing those things (the popular myth), but because they have found a meaningful purpose which makes taking  those actions worthwhile. They are able to consistently get themselves to do things which others don’t like to do and they don’t necessarily like doing either because their disliking is subordinated to the strength of their purpose.

What does that mean?

They have found some deeply meaningful reasons which are emotionally stronger to do than the emotional reasons not to do the things they need to do to become successful. And then they make taking those actions a habit.

Gray uses the term purpose but when you dig deeper he is really talking about values, which are your strongest emotional drivers. He says you need to identify a purpose which is a sentimental or emotional, one which is rooted in your strongest wants and desires.

So essentially, unless your goals relate to your highest values, your strongest underlying emotional reasons why you want to do this or have this or become this they will never drive your actions too far. If you haven’t found those reasons, that is the place to start.

Ask yourself these questions:

• What is most important to me?
• Will achieving this be really good for me, good for others and good for the planet?

You might as well know right now that you are not going to be truly successful unless you can get yourself to do some things that are currently uncomfortable for you to do.

Your success is on the other side of your current comfort zone.

Now here’s the thing: Tapping can help you. Tapping can help you to overcome the emotional blocks to doing the things you need to do to become successful. Tapping can help you to make the discomfort of taking disliked actions less uncomfortable…

However, without the strong energy and powerful inspiration provided by that link to your highest values and desires, no amount of tapping will get you there. So check in emotionally with your goal. If it doesn’t really inspire you, dig deeper until you find what does.

As Seth Godin writes in Lynchpin:

“When you set down the path to create art, whatever sort of art it is, understand that the path is neither short nor easy. That means you must determine if the route is worth the effort. If it’s not, dream bigger.”

(If you are unclear about your values, my Values Intensive Live Workshop DVD set can help you get clear on what is really important to you and help iron out the internal conflicts.)

Here’s something else: as long as you believe that taking action towards your goal, at least in the beginning, should be easy, that you should like taking those actions then you will continue to be held back.

There are some actions that you just do not like doing right now which you will need to do if you are to be successful and achieve your goals. And waiting for all conditions to be perfect will mean you may never do anything at all. Waiting until tapping makes you feel great about taking action may be also be a distraction from action which keeps you stuck.

So your best first use of tapping is this: Tapping to help you to bear with the uncomfortable feelings of going outside your comfort zone towards a valued goal even as you get into action to go there. Tapping as you go.

Every significant move forward is going to require you to move outside your current comfort zone, which means that some discomfort comes with the territory. That even applies when your desired goal is something you really want.

The discomfort of taking steps towards a valued goal is not a bad thing, it is a good form of stress, like stretching a tight muscle is good for the muscle and ultimately good for you. If you continue to see those sensations as bad then you doom yourself to remain in contraction.

Some effort is required for the chick to break free of the egg or the butterfly to come out of the cocoon.

Can’t I just tap away my bad feelings until I feel good and then take action?

Good luck. For when you try tap away those feelings you risk setting up a secondary condition: You may be seeking to avoid something you need to go through. And now you are left with the feeling that you can’t handle those negative feelings, even those that might be good for you! And you remain rooted in inaction, waiting for everything to be perfect and to “feel right” before you will move.

If you keep trying to remove your negative feelings and to “not” feel them then they actually tend to scream more loudly. What you resist tends to persist. On the other hand, once you fully accept and allow those feelings to move you then they will tend to move through you. What you accept and allow no longer has power to control you.

So tap to connect with your end goal, vision, dream, or purpose, and to allow yourself to feel how it will really feel when you have achieved it. Regularly accessing those feelings will really help you to sustain through the difficult times.

Then tap on being willing to experience the feelings you currently see as negative which you will experience when you take steps to move outside your comfort zone.

Tap to get yourself to take action and continue on taking action despite those feelings and any associated negative thoughts being there. Tap for being able to handle the feelings, not to try to tap them away.

Use tapping to allow you to move into what seems like discomfort but is in reality an energy-giving, life-expanding stretch for you.

That, I guarantee you, will be a lot more productive than staying at home and tapping until you get your “vibration” right.

What do you think? I would love to read your comments on this article…

Steve Wells and Dr. David Lake

Enquiring minds thinking in terms of “black and white” have posed this question. Our short answer is “yes”—and “no”.

Both EFT and SET are true energy psychology techniques, and both, in our experience, work well for the right indications. The interesting thing about such techniques (and there are only about 5-6 original ones) is that they all seem to produce results in broadly equivalent fashion; the differences are in the details and method of application.

Let’s say that again up front just to be clear: SET and EFT are both effective in offering relief for emotional and physical distress, and in that respect there may be no clear differences between them; the main differences are in how they are applied.

Both SET and EFT have elements of working directly and indirectly on problems. Both are body techniques that have a large effect indirectly on the problem-thinking. Obviously the tapping points that SET and EFT have in common are not the issue here. The issue as we see it is ease of use and simplicity, particularly when applying energy techniques as self-help. And it is in the area of self-help that SET really comes into its own.

What Is ‘Direct’ Work?

• Most often done with a therapist
• Involves identifying the specific belief and “core” issue.
• Aim is to thoroughly eliminate the effects of all the triggering aspects of a problem.
• Ideally the end result is a peaceful emotional balance: The problem no longer bothers you.
• Examples are treating trauma and phobias

What Is ‘Indirect’ Work?

• Tapping without having to think or focus too much
• Tapping while problems are experienced or felt without having to know what they are
• Tapping as an activity in itself
• Tapping as “self-soothing”
• Lessening the force of problems over time
• Gaining results from tapping in other personal areas of life, and well-being
• After direct work and treatment of specific issues, tapping which is used as self-treatment to help maintain the gains

Why SET Is ‘Better’ / Benefits of SET

A different philosophy of treatment:

1. If you tone down the body’s primitive alarm responses over time, then most problems will find it harder to express through the body.
2. Problems might persist in a mental form but if they don’t bother you emotionally, what is the problem?
3. Regardless of the problem, if the intensity is lessened by tapping, then the pattern of the problem over time is interrupted, and you can function on a higher emotional level (more calm, better balance)

In SET, tapping, or meridian stimulation alone, takes a more central place and the doing of that is seen as paramount, whereas EFT has a number of more complicated processes
SET tapping is typically more indirect, whereas the focus of EFT is on direct work, identifying and targeting “core issues. Whereas SET can also be used in this more direct way, with SET results can also be achieved without needing to be clever or psychological, and SET can be used even when you don’t know what the problem is
Using the indirect tapping approach of SET for “energy toning” the effects of problems are generally felt less and less over time, and the benefits tend to accumulate
SET for self-help is simple to use and therefore typically offers more daily relaxation and body toning—the quantity of tapping is here seen as important
Over time the indirect tapping approach can bring a significant change in body alarm responses (stress) and general emotional reactivity
SET is more naturalistic and simple to use than EFT. The continual tapping practice is the one thing (in our experience) that people attending workshops recall and use consistently after being taught how to do it.
In SET, set-up statements are not required: there is no need to be clever, psychological or to have the right words, and you are encouraged to focus on the problem “in your own way”
SET can be easily added to your daily routine, and practised while doing daily tasks such as telephoning, reading and watching TV
SET is ideal as self-help, and empowering to use
The process of SET is a simple “doing” for people who need that, with simple rules
Anybody can use SET and feel ‘successful’ in different degrees—this is important for continuing use, especially with severe issues.
Tapping is available spontaneously at any time if needed—“just start tapping!”
The simple tapping processes of SET can become a lifelong practice, like building your emotional fitness
SET is Integrative—It can be easily added as a component to any therapeutic approach, by adding continual tapping to the processes being used, whereas the fixed procedures of EFT may intrude into some therapeutic processes
SET is Adaptable—you can simply “graft” tapping on to the problem as you feel it, even if you don’t know what else to do with those feelings

Why EFT Is ‘Better’ / Benefits of EFT

Simple rationale: “The cause of all negative emotion is a disruption in the body’s energy system”

There is a standard recipe and system to EFT, and this particularly appeals to people who need a more structured and standardized approach
EFT may seem more logical and active than SET, and the inclusion of additional components make it seem more comprehensive
The emphasis on direct work and finding core issues in EFT appeals to many people, whereas this is deemphasized in SET
Addressing one issue or aspect at a time in a more or less systematic manner is encouraged in EFT, whereas in treatment using SET there is no imperative to focus specifically in this way (although working on one issue or aspect at a time can be done in SET if desired); this one-at-a-time approach of EFT may be easier to think about for some people.
Many clinical examples exist over a decade of how to utilize EFT
Gary Craig’s DVD’s are an excellent resource for learning EFT and the art of delivery

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Why SET Is ‘Lesser’ / Criticisms of SET

The simple tapping approach of SET may look too trivial and minimal to really help
When using SET for indirect work the active mind may persist with disturbing thoughts, and people can be distracted by such thoughts rather than checking in with their feelings
The mind might not ‘realise’ right away that the feeling of the problem state has changed, since the associated thoughts may persist anyway
When using SET tapping indirectly for self-help it can sometimes take longer for results to manifest and they may be more subtle. This may also be true if the therapeutic approach being used is more general
The SET concept of energy toning seems to conflict with other theories as to how tapping directly might work and the assumed importance of locating and treating “core issues”

Why EFT Is ‘Lesser’ / Criticisms of EFT

Magic thinking abounds due to expectations drummed up by some EFT websites and claims of some practitioners, leading many people to expect a rapid result or a ‘quick fix’
People often have a lot of trouble “finding the right words to say” in their own EFT set-up statements or reminder phrases.
Many people become unsure if they are “doing it right” or even that sometimes it can be done at all (which may be correct as often we need the help of others to change)
It is easy to believe that with EFT you have to be your own therapist—and somehow to do it all yourself
Typically, when EFT doesn’t work, the person blames themselves for not making progress or still having some of the problem (although this criticism could apply equally to SET depending on how it is presented by the practitioner)
EFT is seen as a ‘separate’ activity to ordinary living and requires time and dedication
The concept of having to identify “core issues” can lead many people on a never-ending search for THE right issue to focus on
Using EFT can taper off and fall away as the problem diminishes since it is being used only remedially
Some people with major problems may think they can’t really help themselves much away from the practitioner’s rooms especially where the practitioner taps on or for clients
EFT is a revolutionary technique that has helped hundreds of thousands of people but it can’t always be used directly by yourself, nor for everything. You can try—but often it’s too hard for the ordinary person.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Criticisms that May Apply to both EFT and SET (especially when used only for self-help)

Whilst both SET and EFT may both be ideal for self-help, this may not be the total answer for many people, who will still need regular, direct work on specific problems with the help of a therapist. Applying EFT or SET at length for self-help when the real direct work of personal growth has not been done won’t deliver a great result. That defies common sense.

Working effectively on major problems of depression, social phobias, and compulsions (for example) can often be very difficult, and this leads to doubts, especially if you have been lead to believe that self-help using EFT or SET should be enough to treat these problems. A person with any of these conditions will need plenty of therapeutic help to deal with the real-world issues that have swamped them. They will need direct work with a therapist until they are steady and functioning on a higher level. EFT or SET can be part of that but may not be the only part. EFT and SET will be invaluable in follow up and maintenance of gains.

A common clinical request is for an EFT session for a lifelong problem—with the hope that this single session will fix it. It is worth stating that some people need years of focussed help—and tapping—to achieve emotional freedom. And that this is normal. Some problems will respond to tapping alone but major ones are likely to need everything you can throw at them, including the person’s having a reason and purpose for living, a spiritual source, a support system and the time and motivation to accept help.

In Conclusion

Neither SET nor EFT is ‘better’ or ‘worse’. The question is confusing since both have their place.

The best energy technique for any person is the one that they are going to use and have confidence in. The nature of this use will depend on their understanding. Just the relaxing aspect of SET means a better life for most personal users. For therapists it doesn’t really matter, both SET and EFT (and all the other energy techniques) have compelling results in direct work for fear and anxiety-based problems. For individuals and those interested in self-help, we think SET has a clear advantage.

If you consider that for most of a person’s life they will be helping themselves and others with what they know, then SET is a great gift because the blocks to using it freely are minimal—and then it will be used! And if you agree that most people in the world in need of help won’t be having therapy, then SET as self-help is an ideal simple, usable gift for them to use to deal with as much hurt and anxiety as they can.

By Steve Wells

Here’s something that might surprise many of you: Positive affirmations don’t always produce positive results. In fact, they can – and often do – produce negative results for some people. We have known this for some time from our workshops, where we ask people about their experiences with affirmations. Our consistent finding has been that affirmations only work for a small percentage of people.

In previous blog posts I have written about how affirmations don’t actually work for most people who use them and how so-called negative thinking and negative feeling ain’t always so devastatingly bad as you may think (You can see those previous posts at: http://www.eftdownunder.com/blog/?p=8 and http://www.eftdownunder.com/blog/?p=9 )

Now there is some research which supports the contentions I made in those previous posts and also points to why our PET approach works so well.

According to a recent study in Psychological Science (as reported in Science Daily), individuals with low self-esteem can actually feel worse about themselves after repeating positive self-statements. The researchers, psychologists Joanne V. Wood and John W. Lee, asked participants with low self-esteem and others with high self-esteem to repeat the typical self-help book phrase “I am a lovable person”, then measured their moods and their momentary feelings about themselves.

The participants who had low self-esteem felt worse after repeating the positive self-statement compared to another low self-esteem group who did not repeat the self-statement! On the other hand, the individuals with high self-esteem did feel better after repeating the positive self-statement, but only slightly.

In a follow up study where the participants were allowed to list negative self-thoughts along with positive self-thoughts, the paradoxical finding was that low self-esteem participants actually had better mood responses when they were allowed to have negative thoughts than when they were asked to focus exclusively on positive thoughts!

The following quote taken from the Science Daily Article raises an issue which should be of concern to all who are still routinely using the same EFT set-up phrase with every client:

“The psychologists suggested that, like overly positive praise, unreasonably positive self-statements such as “I accept myself completely” can provoke contradictory thoughts in individuals with low self-esteem. Such negative thoughts can overwhelm the positive thoughts.”

(Journal Reference: Wood et al. Positive Self-Statements: Power for Some, Peril for Others. Psychological Science, 2009)

This was our consistent finding when using the self-acceptance phrase in EFT. In another controversial article on our blog I wrote how when we were using EFT we discovered that using the self-acceptance phrase actually causes many people to “tune into” their self-acceptance issues (i.e. it puts them in touch with their lack of self-acceptance!). For these people, we achieved consistent positive results by having them repeat a seeming “negative” phrase instead, such as, “I deeply and completely reject myself!” Of course we would do this with the characteristic humour of the PET style. (That article can be found here: http://www.eftdownunder.com/blog/?p=17 )

In our workshops we’ve frequently demonstrated that having a person repeat aloud their negative belief often results in a lift in their energy state (or what I call a “yes” response) where they clearly accept that statement as “true”. Then having them repeat an opposite, positive belief often results in a disturbance in their state (or “no” response), where they clearly energetically and emotionally reject that statement. Therefore, rushing to the positive side and having them repeat this can overwhelm them and be an invalidation, similarly to simply telling a depressed person to “cheer up”. As Marianne Williamson has said, it is our light, not out darkness, that most frightens us.

Paradoxically, a lack of willingness by the practitioner to work with the dark side may prevent some people from being able to more easily approach the light!

The research mentioned above very much vindicates the approach we take in PET which, by joining with the client’s negative beliefs, validating them, and tapping on them, leads to positive shifts away from attachment to the negative belief, and more acceptance of the positive alternative.

Now of course as the research from Psychological Science points out, those who already have high self-esteem and who can accept the positive belief statement without having the energetic equivalent of a hernia can go straight to the positive side. In PET, when we see an energetic “opening” where the client is ready that is when we know we can deliver positive messages without provoking a repulsion or rejection response… This stage is often reached only after a lot of tapping whilst focusing on the negative belief and it’s antecedents.

But there is a level beyond releasing negative beliefs or accepting positive alternative beliefs., and this can be achieved often only after continued tapping on both sides of the belief continuum and on all the emotional attachments to these beliefs, whether negative or positive. This is the transformative step where we start to realise that none of these beliefs are real, they are all just ideas from the vast sea of ideas. They are not us, we are not them. This is a move towards the place of peace, the land beyond duality, where the concept of positive or negative is no longer necessary or relevant.

To end, one of our favourite quotes from Rumi:

“Out beyond ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing there is a field. I’ll meet you there.”

Click this link to find out how you can attend a life-changing workshop with Steve Wells and Dr. David Lake:  http://www.eftdownunder.com/events.html

What do you think?

We would love to read your comments.

By Steve Wells

“It is only with the heart that you can see rightly. What is essential is invisible to the eye.”
- Antoine de Saint Exupéry, The Little Prince

Emotional Freedom is neither a technique nor a set of techniques. Emotional Freedom may be the reason or the goal we are using our various techniques to achieve, but it’s a trap to assume that emotional freedom is somehow IN the techniques themselves. In fact, real freedom may exist independent of techniques. And when we look at what really produces our results, it may come from something other than the mechanical techniques. Or how could different people using the same techniques get different results?

In this article I want to do three things. The first is to consider this elusive concept of “emotional freedom” and try to define it. The second is to separate this from being the sole province of any specific technique and point out the dangers of doing so. And third, I want to draw your attention to other seemingly hidden factors which are crucial to achieving the results we desire, the hidden factors which facilitate the transfer of energy and emotion between people.

EFT is just a technique

The basic recipe in EFT is just a technique. In its original form it is actually a very mechanical process. SET in its most basic form of tapping on energy points, could be considered the same. As could TFT and TAT among other Energy Psychology techniques. You can use these tools to assist you to achieve emotional freedom. But on their own they are just mechanical sets of steps to follow. So how can they be used to help bring about emotional freedom?

First we’d better get clear on our goal…

What is emotional freedom?

Many people define emotional freedom as freedom from ever having or experiencing negative emotions. They seem to see it as a state where you only feel good and you never feel bad. But how can that be freedom?

If I am fearful of my negative emotions and only allowed to think and feel good things, am I really free?

Is emotional freedom about freedom from emotion, or freedom of emotion? Surely the latter, otherwise we shut down or constrain our capacity to feel.

Is emotional freedom about never having or experiencing negative emotions, or is it about being able to flow with those emotions and learn from them? Again, surely the latter, or else how can we grow?

To me, emotional freedom isn’t about having to avoid what concerns us – to me you are emotionally free when you can face up to what used to upset you and it has no emotional hooks in you and thus no longer controls you.

Here’s how I currently define emotional freedom:

Emotional freedom is a state of being free from the limiting effects of negative emotions, and emotional attachments generally. It is not a place where you do not experience negative emotions, but is a space where you are not emotionally attached to them, stuck by them or stuck in them… It is a state where you are free to be moved by or to flow with all of your emotions, without being hooked into having to react in certain ways by them.

So let’s look again at using techniques to assist us to achieve emotional freedom.

If emotional freedom is the overall goal then should we not be focusing on that rather than being tied to any specific technique for achieving it? Otherwise if we only have one tool or one way of using it perhaps we are the ones without freedom … Like the old cliché: If your only tool is a hammer then you tend to treat every problem as if it is a nail.

To the extent that EFT (or any other Energy Technique) assists us or our clients to achieve greater emotional freedom then it is useful. But the tool isn’t the important thing, the outcome for the client is.

When we become wedded to one technique only we may lose sight of our real goal

If tapping is our only tool for every problem is there not a danger of treating people as nails to be tapped on? And is there not also a danger that we may eschew (shun or avoid) other potentially useful treatments that may also contribute to their (our) emotional and physical freedom? Another danger, perhaps more insipid, is that we forget about the other contributors towards the outcomes we get, such as the role of relationships, and the role of our own energy and emotion.

Here’s an important question when it comes to using these techniques with other people:

How important is the technique itself and how important are other factors to achieving the outcomes we are after?

Importance of the relationship

In all the research on therapeutic outcomes, the one thing that stands out is a factor called the therapeutic alliance. This is a fancy term used to describe the quality of the relationship between therapist and client. Independent of what approach to therapy is being researched, therapeutic alliance repeatedly comes out on top as the biggest factor contributing towards success.

But does this apply to Energy Techniques?

When Callahan introduced TFT (the precursor of EFT) to the world, he introduced it as a technique that worked independently of the rapport or relationship between therapist and client. Fred Gallo says similarly in his book Energy Psychology when he states that rapport appears to have little to do with the effectiveness of these procedures; and that they do not appear to be a necessary or sufficient condition for therapeutic effectiveness, although he does concede that rapport may be useful in itself and “may also enhance the therapeutic effectiveness of these methods”.

I believe the therapeutic factor of rapport and the relationship between practitioner and client in Energy Psychology results has been under-recognised. But here I am talking about a deeper level and definition of the term rapport. In fact, I believe from my own experience with clients that much of what has been called “psychological reversal” could be attributed to a resistance borne out of lack of rapport, lack of a strong connection and/or lack of acceptance by practitioner and/or client, and that by focusing on developing our rapport, connection, and acceptance we will get better results.

What is the evidence for this?

Firstly, the fact that different people using the same techniques get different results. If it were just down to mechanical technique, shouldn’t all results be the same? In one university research study on EFT treatment of public speaking fears , therapist factors were clearly evident: Some therapists were achieving superior results. What is the difference that makes a difference here? My discussion with the researchers suggests that skill in gaining rapport and capacity to work with different people was a crucial factor.

Secondly, let’s look at the differences in results that WE get with different clients. What is the difference that makes a difference in those results? In my own case I can recall a large number of cases where the defining factor was the level of rapport and acceptance which we achieved. I say “we” here because I see therapy as a joint effort between client and practitioner. When I look at clients with whom my results were less positive I can often pinpoint a difficulty in rapport and connection as the culprit.

Thirdly, let’s look at the progress of these techniques in the world. I contend that one of the primary reasons that EFT has gone further than has TFT in general acceptance comes down to Gary Craig’s awareness of the importance of rapport and use of this in both his writings and his workshops. Gary has endeared himself to many people by showing he can “speak their language” and understand their concerns – and his work with clients shows a highly developed capacity for achieving rapport. The term itself, Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) is itself more user-friendly.

What about the Art of Delivery?

Gary in his workshops and DVD’s has often discussed “the art of delivery” as being what separates those who get great results from the simply good or mediocre practitioners. But what is “the art of delivery” and what is it about this which produces the biggest part of the results? Does it come down to the tapping part of the equation? It can’t do. When you look at Gary work he is tapping on the same points as other practitioners, and often in the same order. But his results are clearly superior.

Let’s take a closer look at Gary’s work. What is really being taught here? At a simple level of analysis, you could look at the tapping. At another level you can observe the synchrony of the language Gary uses when working with clients. He uses language which “resonates” for the client, and he tends to adapt his style and language to them. Look deeper and you will see how he uses his voice and body to engage with the client. His body orientation is clearly open and positive and towards his clients. And his voice and language style shows care and concern. All of which is about rapport. However, to me this is still at a more “surface” level.

The level where change happens

The deeper level of analysis cannot always be seen. It needs to be felt. Sure, it is reflected in the words, the language, the body and the voice. But it is not something which can always be picked up from a DVD, which is one thing which makes me sceptical that DVD training will ever be the main way for learning it.

I think it is based in Gary’s feelings and intentions towards his clients.

I contend that it is the beautiful way of being with another person that is on display that represents Gary’s most powerful teaching.

Without the rapport, connection, love and compassion displayed by Gary in his sessions I contend that others will not get the same results. I think it is the transfer of this feeling energy between the practitioner and client where the more profound results really come.

This is not just “the art of delivery” in terms of the mechanical application of a set of techniques or even the fact that you match your presentation to the client. It is about something much stronger. Like love. Acceptance. And human connection. A loving connection combined with healing intention that transfers healing energy.

Ask anyone who has worked with Gary and they will tell you that they felt these things. These things which are not really things, things which exist independently of technique.

I defy anyone to get the same results without them.

Some years ago, I came across this quote by Stephen Covey which has stayed with me as a guiding principle ever since: “Only basic goodness gives life to technique.”

That’s the difference right there between the tappers who are mechanically following a formula and the elite performers in the Energy world.

You might as well know right now that everyone I know in this world who is producing superior results in helping their clients to change using Energy Techniques has developed some kind of spiritual basis to the work they do.

And here I am not talking about the province or doctrine of any particular religion.

More that they are consciously aware of the flow of energy within and between themselves and the client. They know that their positive intention or wish for the client, their acceptance of the client, their – dare I say it – love for the client, and the energetic connection they achieve with the client are crucially affecting every result they get.

There, I’ve said it.

What do you think?

Develop your capacity to use energy for emotional healing in a live workshop. Click here: http://www.eftdownunder.com/events.html

 By Steve Wells

I wrote this article ahead of International Men’s Health Week which will be held next week (June 15-21):

Here’s a radical feminist joke for you:

Q: Why do men die earlier?

A: Because they deserve it!

I’m not even going to ask how many of you find that funny.

Probably the same number that were affronted by the assertion that men suffer more. (Actually, they do, but since they caused it anyway they don’t deserve compassion, says our radical friend!)

It’s a fact you know: Men DO die some 6 years earlier than women on average. And they come out ahead in a huge number of areas (they love winning competitions!), such as cancer, heart disease, respiratory diseases, accidents generally, and motor vehicle accidents specifically, diabetes, and the list goes on.

And the situation is even worse when it comes to mental and emotional health. The suicide rate for men is 4 times higher than women.

But who cares really?

If you’re a man, probably not you. As one Australian Government website states:

“The poor health status of Australian men is complicated by the fact that men are more likely than women to shy away from medical treatment of any kind. The lack of health awareness and unwillingness to adopt a healthier lifestyle also disadvantages men.”

My research shows this is the same for men in other countries too.

With apologies to Thoreau: Most men do live lives of quiet desperation. Then their bowel drops out. Then they die.

Oh, they might go to the doctor at the point when their bum starts dragging on the ground, with a request like, “Put that back in will you doc?”

Or maybe, for the more enlightened new-age man it might be something along the lines of, “Do you think there might be something wrong?”

You bet there is buddy!

We need to do something about our health BEFORE it comes to this. And yes I personally had to learn the lesson that health is important by first suffering a health crisis… (not my ass though, that is still attached!). But I would love to save you from suffering a similar fate.

So I went online today to look at some of the things that are being done for International Men’s Health Week. In my searching, I found this quote on a UK site stating the goals of this special week:

“The purpose of Men’s Health Week is to heighten the awareness of preventable health problems and encourage early detection and treatment of disease among men and boys.”

I thought about that.

Not to encourage us men to be more healthy, but to encourage early detection and treatment of disease…

Can’t we do better than that? Can’t we focus on getting us men to care about our own mental, physical, and emotional health… Oh, don’t be stupid! You’ll be lucky if you can get them to go for a check up…

So it makes me think, am I stupid for thinking that Andy Bryce and I can get a few men and caring women in the UK to come along to a workshop with the provocative title, Emotional Freedom for Men?

Probably.

I hope not. (That I’m stupid I mean)

I want to see this as just the beginning of helping men all over the world to gain relief from emotional issues and release emotional blocks.

Emotional issues? You mean anger don’t you? The world is full of angry men. If men could just learn to manage their anger they would be a lot easier to get along with and the world would be at peace.

Yes. No. Maybe.

Anger is perhaps the only negative emotion that is semi-legitimate for us men to express. But it’s not really anger that’s the biggest problem. It’s fear, sadness, and hurt.

Larry Nims, the creator of BSFF, taught us that underneath anger there is almost always fear, sadness, hurt, and/or deep hurt. And I have found this to be spot on.

But you don’t usually get to see the underlying hurt because number one we men aren’t allowed to show it, and number two, unless someone helps us to see, we may not even know it. It’s unconscious.

We men don’t have as many connections from our feeling centre to our language centre as women do. That’s not an excuse, it’s a fact. And talking about our problems does not usually make many men feel better, it makes them feel worse.

But tapping helps.

I’ve now worked with hundreds of men using tapping and I can tell you that the thing that comes up most consistently when we get underneath their anger is deep hurt.

Anger is just the surface emotion.

I’ll never forget talking with Rehana Webster some years ago about her work with chronic recidivist (ie repeat) offenders. Rehana is an EFT Master, now based in Perth, and she gained a bit of notoriety in New Zealand for significantly reducing reoffending rates with these offenders (yes, they were all men) using tapping.

How did she do it? Well primarily by tapping with them on their past traumas. By the way, Rehana found that every one of the guys she worked with had a significant trauma prior to age 12, such as having been abused or losing a parent.

What stood out for me back then was when she described working with one big man, and as his traumatic stress dropped away, he said essentially, “I don’t even know why I did all those bad things … I was just feeling so angry.”

Anger fuelled by hurt.

When the traumatic experiences driving the anger were addressed, the need for the anger dropped away.

You want to tap on something? Try tapping on your deep hurt, and any past memories you have of feeling this way. It will rapidly accelerate your progress.

And here’s something to contemplate, when you think about all the angry men in your life:

“People are very tender, very sensitive inside. I don’t believe age or experience makes much difference. Inside, even within the most toughened and calloused exteriors, are the tender feelings and emotions of the heart.

- Stephen R. Covey

We just have to be willing to look beneath the surface…

If you are a man or woman who wants to be part of a revolution in treating male emotional issues using tapping, consider coming along to the first Emotional Freedom for Men Workshop to be held this August in London. You’ll learn a whole host of new distinctions for using Energy Techniques like EFT and SET to treat a whole host of men’s emotional issues. And we’ll have fun too. Even though we shouldn’t.

You can find all the details of the Emotional Freedom for Men workshop here:

http://www.eftdownunder.com/LondonAug09.html

By the way, the title of this article is not mine – It is the title of the 6th Biennial Congress on Men’s Health and Gender to be held in Vienna, Austria in October…

What do you think? We would love to read your comments.

By Steve Wells

When using EFT, the first step is to design a set-up statement, which includes a self-acceptance statement combined with a description of the problem. Something along the lines of “I accept myself even though I have this (problem)”. Or “Even though I have this (problem), I deeply and completely accept myself.”

The set-up in EFT involves repeating the abovementioned statement whilst tapping on the karate chop point or rubbing a sore spot on the chest and is presumed necessary in order to deal with psychological reversal, or subconscious blocking beliefs that can get in the way of your getting over the problem…

Now as an aside you probably know that we have shown with
SET that it isn’t necessary to use a set-up statement in order to do this, or to get progress on your problem. But I digress…

When we were using EFT (before developing SET) we noticed an incredible number of people coming to us with self-acceptance issues such as, “I’m not good enough”, “I’m not worthy”; “I’m not smart enough”, and so on…”. Everyone seemed to be dealing with self-acceptance challenges.

Why was this? Was it just because self-acceptance IS such a universal issue? Well yes it is but why was self-acceptance coming up into the open so often when it hadn’t normally come up to this degree in our respective practices prior to using EFT?

The reason is obvious in hindsight. It was because the set-up statement we were using in EFT was helping them to “tune into” their self-acceptance problem! Far from helping clients to accept themselves, which many in the EFT world falsely believe, the use of the set-up statement was actually provoking out their lack of self-acceptance. They were being forced to say, “I deeply and completely accept myself” and their internal reaction was “Hang on, that’s not true, I don’t accept myself at all!”

A positive side to this is that we, along with maybe thousands of other EFT practitioners worldwide would then go off into working with them on their self-acceptance issues … which in and of itself isn’t a bad thing. Except that it might not be the issue they came in expecting to treat…

Some clients, particularly those with the biggest self-acceptance issues (meaning that they didn’t accept themselves at all, or were even downright hostile towards themselves), were so upset by the self-accepting part of the EFT set-up statement that they refused to say it. Over the years, many EFT practitioners have grappled with this issue, and there have been numerous alternatives to the standard set-up statement proposed – such as having them state that even though they don’t accept themselves they want to accept themselves, or other variations…

In fact, there have now been so many different set-up statements that have been proposed and used, presumably all with great effect, and so many of these bear almost no resemblance to the originally proposed format, that it seems difficult to justify the insistence that such a standard set-up format is really necessary…

And here’s something even more interesting…

Because our tendency in using Provocative Energy Techniques (PET) is to join with and exaggerate the energy and position that is given to us by our clients, we would often go along with the negative thinking of those clients who balked at the positive version of the self-accepting statement and have them instead repeat a statement such as the following:

“Even though I have this (problem) I deeply and completely reject myself!”

Many of our clients would very willingly repeat such a statement, often smiling or nodding with agreement as they did so! And here’s the thing: They would then typically go on and have a significant shift on the presenting issue!

In fact, we found using this so-called “negative” statement in the EFT set-up could have as much potential for shifting clients’ issues, sometimes more so, than using the regular “positive” self-acceptance set-up statement. So much for the assumption that the set-up statement must have a positive, self-accepting component to be effective.

How can this be?

In the world of duality, in the presence of everything is it’s opposite. Whenever you tune into the issue of self-acceptance, you tune into a belief system which includes both sides, the part of you that does accept yourself, and the part of you that is down on yourself. Try telling yourself that you accept yourself when you really don’t and up will come the other side, or your own internal resistance to this idea.

This is what we found would happen when we used the “positive” EFT self-acceptance set-up statement. If you hold a negative view of yourself, particularly if these beliefs are very strong, repeating a positive, self-accepting statement can in fact provoke many people to think and feel more negatively. The strange paradox is that also, for many people, repeating a negative, self-rejecting statement can provoke an internal reaction that “I’m not that bad!”

What’s our real aim here?

Is our aim in treating self-acceptance issues to end up in a position where we always think positively about ourselves? Or is it to accept all of ourselves, including the parts that currently disturb us? I contend that it is the latter.

The challenge of course is that we don’t want to accept our dark parts, we fear that if we do that they will overwhelm us. This is why Carl Jung says that “The most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely.” Actually, with SET and PET accepting oneself doesn’t have to be so terrifying after all.

Now there’s another question:

Is it really the positive self-accepting statement in EFT that causes the result, or is it that by pairing a positive and a negative statement you have a version of yin and yang together, that you are stating both sides of something? That is a more truthful position. If that is so, then any variation of this could work. Even though I shouldn’t have this problem, I do have it. Try that, and I’m sure you will find it will work just as well as the originally proposed format…

Here’s another alternative:

Eliminate the set-up altogether, and go straight for the problem, accepting whatever “is” for you, and just apply tapping to its presence, as in SET, without trying to change anything. Then follow whatever comes up, accepting each aspect of the problem as legitimate and real, and just adding tapping, as you move through different levels and layers of the problem…

Some people worry that accepting the problem as it really is will lead to passivity, like giving in. Or they fear that the problem will rise up and overwhelm them. But this doesn’t tend to happen.

Sometimes when tapping and going with whatever comes, there can be an initial spike of negative emotion, but then the problem often rapidly settles down (If it doesn’t after persistent tapping, consider consulting with a trained therapist or physician).

Ultimately, acceptance frees up massive energy for change, energy that has previously been wasted in resistance (where what you resist, persists).

As Carl Rogers says, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” Acceptance is not passive at all. It is a doorway through which all change happens.

There is so much more that can be said however I hope these few ideas have provoked some thought.

What do you think? I look forward to reading your comments.

Best wishes,

Steve Wells

PS: Come to a workshop and learn how self-acceptance using SET and PET can be a doorway to profound personal peace. Here’s an example of feedback we’ve received:

“Dearest Steve

I am resting and relaxing in a pleasant, peaceful place on my self-acceptance journey.  I have never been to this place before.  I need no-one’s permission, and I need no-one’s approval.  I really like this new way of being. (It) is a totally new and foreign space but I love it. Thank you always”

Gail Bayly

For details of upcoming workshops see: http://www.eftdownunder.com/events.html

By Dr. David Lake

“The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient while nature cures the disease.” (Voltaire)

Much of the confusion relating to results of EFT—and ‘tapping’ generally—is because of the way these results are described—a language problem. An added problem is the intellectual conflict between ‘orthodox’ and ‘natural’ medicine. The end result of this process can be “over-promising” results and a misguided enthusiasm.

It seems likely that the use of tapping will move out into the population via self-help, and spread that way. It won’t necessarily be promulgated by those trained in critical thinking. Most people don’t think scientifically. But it is common sense to talk about what works and what doesn’t, according to experience and training. When you consider that EFT is being used predominantly as self-help then we need some precision in describing what is currently possible to do. Otherwise, “try it on everything” might mean “I should be able to make it work on everything” and if I can’t then it’s my fault.

Here are some definitions from Dictionary.com (my emphases):

TREAT: to deal with (a disease, patient, etc.) in order to relieve or cure.

CURE: a means of healing or restoring to health; remedy; successful remedial treatment; restoration to health.

HEAL: to make healthy, whole, or sound; restore to health; free from ailment.

ALLEVIATE: to make easier to endure; lessen; mitigate: to alleviate sorrow; to alleviate pain.

Obviously using these words carries a heavy responsibility. There is nothing worse than giving people false hope. Let’s be quite clear what we are doing when we use tapping.

Here are some vague terms often bandied about in the treatment of subtle and complex conditions. Using these might imply to the gullible that you are healing or curing when in fact you are often merely assisting a remedial process to a minor or moderate degree (alleviating). Possibly you are relieving a symptom while the disease process continues unchecked (this is potentially dangerous, especially for head, chest and eye pains). All practitioners could slip up here.

FIX

SORT OUT

RESOLVE

HELP WITH

REMOVE

REBALANCE

Bear in mind that EFT is not a therapy in itself, it is a technique. The therapeutic aspects of EFT as it has been taught by Gary Craig owe a great deal to NLP (Neurolinguistic programming) which in turn is derived from the work of Milton Erickson and others such as Frank Farrelly. They were trained in basic psychological medicine, hypnotherapy, groupwork and psychotherapy, at length).

How many orthodox practitioners realise that when patients go to alternative practitioners it is often because they want to feel empowered and capable of helping manage their own conditions? And that ordinary people can’t distinguish between snake oil and science much of the time? That they don’t understand modern medicine at all? That taking modern drugs seems the ‘wrong’ thing to do, especially antibiotics (even when needed) or antidepressants (sometimes a complex issue involving self-criticism and blame). Often it seems that medical statements by doctors are so qualified and hedged and statistical that it seems there is little certainty of a good outcome when in fact the chances might be excellent! Statistics apply only to groups and not necessarily to any individual.

While the world of evidence-based medicine can be restrictive and rigid because of the actual lack of such evidence, at least the treatment protocols are put to the test with more than anecdotal evidence. Since it has taken several decades for enough evidence for relaxation therapy to enter this framework, I don’t think EFT is going to make it any time soon! This is because there is relatively little formal evidence that there is any scientific basis for tapping. This doesn’t bother me too much as long as it is safe and effective within its own limits.

On the other hand, ignorance of the basic condition and of past efforts by those in other fields, compounds the problem. This is a mistrust of the best aspects of science, evidence-gathering  and ‘critical thinking’ skills. In other words, an opposition to orthodox medical approaches. How many alternative practitioners in the ‘psychological’ area—using EFT freely— have looked at, or even know of, a book called the DSM 4 (a descriptive book on psychological disorders and presentations)?  I often get blank looks when I mention it. How many of these practitioners have a grounding in any formal therapy? How many people comment on the treatment of depression without ever qualifying their comments to distinguish between types or grades of depression? The basics are important.

Both branches of medicine can help. Read Dr William E. Hablitzel’s new book “12 Secrets For Healing” if you want to know more (see http://www.storiesandhealing.com/).

I think the truth is quite suitable as a starting point in assessing and delivering EFT results. Gary Craig frequently says (words to the effect) in his teaching materials that: “we don’t know if it can help…but let’s give it a try!” I encourage everybody to do this— and then assess the results. There are countless examples of the body’s innate ability to heal, and tapping contributes to this strongly, in my opinion. Words and language are very important here as they can go directly to the positive or negative beliefs we have, both as practitioner and sufferer. When a serious illness (cancer, multi-system disease, degenerative conditions) is present, and you wish to use tapping to heal, here is the truth in a single sentence:

“With every serious condition there is always a group of people that do well; to be in that group, and stay in that group, there are many helpful things you need to learn, and using tapping is one of the better ones”.

It is the therapeutic aspects of using any technique that are just as important as the practical outcome; the subtle communication of optimism and hope, the relational aspects for the client of being heard, understood and even accepted, the possibilities of change and improvement (avoiding the feeling of helplessness), the mutual aim, the connection and empathy, the harnessing of the healing process in a special environment, for example. Some would call it a spiritual endeavour. But this is another subject.

What do you think? We would love to read your comments…

By Steve Wells

Recently I’ve revisited the work of Byron Katie as outlined in her brilliant book, Loving What Is, and her most recent work, Who Would You be Without Your Story? I think Katie’s approach has much to offer for helping us to get beyond our suffering over the so-called “global financial meltdown” which is focusing so much of our attention lately.

In her process, called The Work, Katie outlines some powerful questions which you can ask whenever you are upset. The core of her process rests upon the question Is it true? which is followed up with, Can you absolutely know that it’s true? This and two further questions, How do you react when you believe that thought? And Who would you be without the thought? Are applied to whatever is disturbing you at the moment. These 4 questions, followed by consideration of several opposites to the problem thought, which Katie calls the turnaround, can lead you to the realisation that the only thing you can really know is real is what is happening right here right now. And that is all you have to deal with. What a relief to find that what you have really been upset about is just a “story” about what is happening, or a concept or judgment that you have attached to.

The process of questioning your thoughts and focusing on only what you can really know as true can be liberating. As I said to one of my clients recently, you only have to deal with what you have to deal with … and you won’t know what that is until you get there! Everything else is a story…

Katie’s simple proposition is that the only way you can really suffer is when you believe a thought (which argues with reality). The way I would put it is you suffer when you emotionally attach to an idea or concept about reality. Reality is much kinder than we think. My other favourite author of the moment William Hablitzel (author of Dying Was the Best Thing That Ever Happened to Me) puts it this way: Nothing in this world can be as bad as that which we can imagine.

How relevant is this to our time?

All over the world right now, people are being “inducted” into fear-based thinking and feeling through fear-based marketing and politicking. We are daily being encouraged to associate to thoughts and images of doom and gloom. As my wife Louise pointed out on the weekend, the worst of this is all those sections in newspapers and magazines offering us suggestions for “making do with less”. How to budget. How to survive in tough times. This is supposed to help us? Actually, no, it is designed to sell more magazines and newspapers, because fear sells. These articles purporting to help tend actually reinforce a perception that (for most of us) things are worse than they really are… And so they feed the fear and stir up more panic…

If this is you, don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal… and there is a way out…

Many scientists now believe that it is normal for our minds to think “negatively”, that our minds have developed in an evolutionary capacity to project images and ideas of possible future danger in order that we can avoid it, or work out how to deal with it. All of which is good when that’s all that happens. Any number of options and possibilities can be considered, and even dealt with, as long as we continue to ground ourselves in what is real and true and live our lives based on that. But how tempting to go into the possible future scenario and start to experience it “as if” it is real. And then you suffer it, like a movie that you believe is real just because the camera presents it to you from the perspective of being inside it…

The challenge is to realise it is not real.

So in your mind you may be eating gruel when in reality your fridge is full of food…

Or even worse, by buying into the BS* about the “global crisis” you become distracted from focusing your energies around what is most important in our life…

* Belief Systems

Maybe you miss out on the joy of following your bliss because you are “holding back”, believing its too dangerous right now to take a step towards your dream…

Or you sit, panic-stricken with worry about losing your house while your kids stand right in front of you smiling, wanting to play…

Is there any hope?

At the time of writing, Barack Obama has just been inaugurated as the 44^th president of the United States. How many people are looking to this young man to inspire hope, to come up with solutions to stimulate confidence in the financial markets of the world? In our local newspaper the cartoon of the day shows a massive crowd around a figure on a podium and they are all shouting to him, “Show us a miracle, show us a miracle…” What a massive expectation and assumption that our problems can really be solved by someone else… Perhaps the best that can be hoped for is that Barack continues to encourage us to focus on our own power and reminds us we only ever have to deal with what is right in front of us now.

Back in 1933, in his own inaugural speech made right in the thick of the great depression, Franklin D. Roosevelt asserted, “the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” Yes, our fear of (feeling) fear is something we will do almost anything to avoid. But do we really need to fear fear? Do we really even need to fear fear-based thinking? Do we need to accept any of it as real?

Wouldn’t we be better off to understand that our biggest problem is that we have bought into a negative belief system? That the only problem we can really have is in the story we attach to the current world situation and the feelings this provokes in us?

To free yourself from emotional suffering we need to free ourselves from attachment to this story. Katie’s work helps brilliantly with this. And tapping does too.

So if you find yourself experiencing fear over the current financial “story”, or any personal story that has been provoked by this, start tapping. Allow your feelings and even your worrying thoughts to be there, without trying to oppose them. Katie would say, meet them with understanding. It isn’t the thoughts that are the problem; it’s the emotional attachment to them which is causing you to suffer.

If you are aware of your thinking, and can identify the story you are telling yourself about the world financial situation or any current problem you have (perhaps something along the lines of “We’re all going to die…”) then let those thoughts and that story just be there as you continue to tap. Run the movie through. As you look at the self-projected scenarios of gloom and doom and continue to tap, you will almost certainly find that you start to relax, that your focus moves to the now, that the images become less compelling or even harder to focus on. If you have a difficult situation to deal with, practical things you can do right now to improve things may start to come into focus, and you may start to realise and get in touch with your strengths. Maybe you will also become, as I have, even more focused on and determined to centre your life around what is really important to you. (Note: If this doesn’t happen, even after persistent tapping, might I suggest consulting a therapist and getting some help?)

A lot of people are trying to avoid reading and watching the news, but I think that is a great thing to do; read or watch and tap as you do. At the end of this process you will be able to look at the statements in the newspaper and see them for what they are. As the words of someone trying to sell newspapers. Then as you continue to tap further on your reaction to that story you may even get to the point where you see them as simply words on a page. Then as merely ink on paper. And then that even that is a concept…

Here’s how Katie describes the process in her Work (which also applies to tapping):

“You’re walking through the desert and it’s a beautiful day and you look down and see a big fat rattlesnake and you’re terrified of rattlesnakes. You jump back, your heart is racing, your pulse is beating, you’re paralysed with fear… Then the sun goes behind a cloud and you look again, and it isn’t a snake after all – it’s a rope.

Now I invite you to stand over the rope for a thousand years and make yourself afraid of it again. You can’t. This is self-realization. You have realized for yourself what is true. And you can never be afraid of that rope again…”

If you find yourself reacting to negative stories, I highly recommend the work of Byron Katie. And tapping. Tap on the emotional attachments which are driving your suffering, until you end up back in the here and now where everything that’s real is happening. Tap to remind yourself what is really important, and move forward with that firmly in focus… And if it’s right for you, consider joining us at one of the upcoming Values Intensive Workshops and spend two full days focused on releasing the BS and getting in touch with what is most important to you in your life!

For details of all our upcoming workshops, click here:

http://www.eftdownunder.com/events.html

What do you think? We would love to read your comments.